Airports

 

 

I have listed below my nomination for the world’s best and worst airports. I invite your comments on these as well as your rivaling nominations in these categories and your creation of other categories As you see fit. Let’s hear it for airports.

World’s Worst Embarkation Procedures: Kinshasa Airport, Zaire. It takes about two hours to clear customs and get to your flight gate. It also cost me from $60 to $80 every departure in bribes to customs and baggage people.

Worst Landing Conditions: Helsinki Airport, Finland. I have landed at this airport three times and have yet to see the runways. The fog was so thick I couldn’t even see them after we were rolling on them. All Finnair pilots are officers in the Finnish Air Force I was told.

Best Security Procedures: Lod Airport, Israel. You may have an orgasm while being searched at Lod but you won’t smuggle anything aboard the aircraft. When they “pat you down” they do it all over.

Best People-Watching: San Francisco Airport, USA and Hong Kong Airport. A tie in this category. Both airports present a parade of very unusual patrons and waiters for arrivals. Good show.

Best Embarkation Procedures: Dulles Airport, Washington D. C. The little bus-to-plane-from-gate concept works very well, and this airport does a great job of handling a large number of passengers in a small space.

Worst Scheduling Airport: Malpensa Airport, Milan Italy. Not only is this airport also frequently fog bound, but it has almost daily strikes. It is well to call ahead and find out when the strike will start and end and how it will affect your flight. This is very complicated depending on which trade is striking that day. If they say the strike will be over at 3PM however, you can count on it.

Most Confusing Currency Regulations: Djakarta, Indonesia. Probably corrected by now, but when I traveled there they counted all the money you came in with and left with, and you had to explain every Rupiah that you spent while in country and have receipts to back it up. I had a hard time explaining a $500 gap which resulted from a bribe to a Minister of Transportation. I never fully explained it, and they were threatening to hold me but relented.

How about listing some of your favorite airports and the characteristics that made them dear to your heart?